Defying Gravity

Karen always told me about this wonderful musical that she had seen and that I needed to watch it sometime (I still haven't, but I want to).  I regret that I never did watch it with her because now that I've heard some of the music from it, I really want to watch it.  Anyway, most of you reading this blog probably have seen it.  It's called Wicked.  From what I understand, it's the story about Glinda's roommate (the wicked witch of the West, in the Wizard of Oz, who incidentally is named Elphaba, after the initials of the book's author) and how she became wicked.

One of the songs in the musical is called "Defying Gravity" and I find it to be rather inspirational.  I actually have no idea how it fits in with the rest of the play, since I've never seen it, and since the words in the original soundtrack include lines that are not clear without the context of the play, I will quote the slightly modified version that appears in the TV Show Glee, on the episode where Kurt tries to prove that he can sing a girl's part.  Without further babbling, here are the lyrics.
Something has changed within me
Something is not the same
I'm through with playing by the rules
Of someone else's game
Too late for second-guessing
Too late to go back to sleep
It's time to trust my instincts
Close my eyes: and leap!

It's time to try
Defying gravity
I think I'll try
Defying gravity
Kiss me goodbye
I am defying gravity
And you wont bring me down!

I'm through accepting limits
''cause someone says they're so
Some things I cannot change
But till I try, I'll never know!
Too long I've been afraid of
Losing love I guess I've lost
Well, if that's love
It comes at much too high a cost!

I'd sooner buy
Defying gravity
Kiss me goodbye
I'm defying gravity
I think I'll try
Defying gravity
And you wont bring me down!

I'd sooner buy
Defying gravity
Kiss me goodbye
I'm defying gravity
I think I'll try
Defying gravity
And you won't bring me down!
bring me down!



So, what is it about this song that I like?  I'm sure an argument could be made for how the LDS Church's standards are "the rules of someone else's game" and me repressing my homosexual feelings for so much of my life is "losing love I guess I've lost", but I think I'll leave that alone for now.  For one thing, I had Karen's love for three wonderful years and I wouldn't ever say that I lost anything there.  She loved me dearly and I am so grateful for that time.  I definitely didn't lose anything from entering or remaining in that marriage.

I'd really like to go a bit more general than that.  I have never been a person who lets other people set boundaries and limits on me.  I remember, my senior year of high school, I was dejected when I did not win the Math Sterling Scholar at the regional level (I won at my school), which I really thought was an injustice.  So, I decided that I wanted to prove to the world that I was good at math.  I studied really hard all school year long, and at the end of the school year they have a state math test, where all high school students in Utah are invited to attend.  I took first place in the test.  I graduated in 4 years (not counting a 2 year break for my mission trip) with a BS and MS in math.  I do not let other people dictate to me what I can and cannot do.  I set my own limits and my own expectations.

"It's time to try defying gravity."  If I set my sights on something, nothing will get in the way of me reaching that goal.  "You can't bring me down."  God did not send us here to this Earth to fail, to give up, to become discouraged.  Discouragement and despair are useless emotions.  As Paul wrote to Timothy "God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind." (2 Tim 1:7).  I take courage in everything that I do.  Of course, I like to make sure that I'm doing the right thing before I embark on a quest, but once I've embarked, I press forward with faith and with momentum until I've achieved my purpose.  I did so while I was missionary in Japan, I did so in college, I do so now as a graduate student, and I will continue to do so in all of my endeavors in life.