Skip to main content

Attention Seeking

A friend made a comment to me in regards to the Donald Trump backlash.  He said that Trump is an attention-seeker.  In fact, he seems to be pretty good at getting people to pay attention to him.  That attention isn't always positive.  But some people just want attention, whether positive or negative.  (Although, I'm fairly certain he doesn't enjoy all of the abandonment he's been experiencing lately.)

That thought is tangentially connected to what I'd like to make the main point of my post, which is people who say or do similarly hateful or ignorant things.  I've been thinking these last few days how incredible it is that I see more posts about hateful things people say about gays coming from my gay friends than from my conservative friends (the few of those who are left).  

I have made many posts myself of the nature "Look at how ridiculous this thing is that this person said."  Some pastor says some hateful things about gays.  Pat Robertson voices in on one more thing that he knows nothing about.  The KKK hands out fliers in a small town.  Blah blah blah.  I understand why people post them.  I've done it myself.  I feel the anger.  I can't imagine how someone could be so cruel or hateful or ignorant or whatever I feel like they're being.  I feel like someone who says or does things like that should be publicly denounced.  Etc.  

However, I've recently been looking over my newsfeed and wondering if that's a good thing.  There's so much negativity toward gay people that I see in these posts, but none of it is coming from fundamentalist conservative friends who actually believe it and are sharing it because they want to spread their message.  It's all coming from my friends who are gay or pro-gay, who are sharing it because they want to share their hatred from the message in the post.  I feel like I've reached a saturation point.  I don't like it anymore.  And I find it sad and ironic that it's coming from my friends who feel the same way I do.

I don't condemn anyone for making posts of this nature.  I understand why they do it.  I have done it myself.  But I believe that I will try to do so less frequently.  I believe that these kind of posts are contrary to what I wish to achieve for two reasons.  One is that any negativity brings down one's spirit.  It's emotionally wearying to read post after post of horrible, horrific, hateful material.  The other is that it gives attention to people who do not deserve it.

Many of these pastors who say these horrible things love the attention they get.  The Westboro church loves it when people call them haters.  As I understand it, that's how they fund their operation--by suing people for violating their right to free speech or some other nonsensical technicality.  The point is, while everyone has the right to free speech, everyone also has the right to freely ignore people.  When someone's spouting something not worthy of listening to, we should not be echoes of their words.  We should not be repeater towers taking their little voice and amplifying it manyfold to reach a larger audience.  Let their hateful words die out as they exit their lips.  

I may start hiding posts of that nature that I see in my feed.  I don't know.  I may continue to comment on them.  I may occasionally post some on my wall.  But I do believe that it is often counterproductive.  If I wish to share my message of love and acceptance for people who are different, I should not share so many posts which are the hate-filled words of people who would fight against my cause.  I should share more posts which affirm the message I believe in.  

I acknowledge that we need to be vocal about injustices and that doing so is necessary to achieve justice.  So I cannot say that universally no negative posts should ever be made.  But I also believe in the Internet-old adage: don't feed the trolls.

Popular posts from this blog

What's a gainer?

If you haven't already done so, I would suggest reading my previous post before reading this one.  It's sort of an introduction and gives the motivation.  Also, by way of disclosure, this post is not sexually explicit but it does touch on the topic of sexuality and how that relates to the subject at hand.

So, what is a gainer?  I'll relate, as best I can, the experiences I have gone through myself to help answer the question.  I remember when I was a young boy--perhaps around 6 or 7--I would have various fantasies.  Not sexual fantasies, just daydreaming about hypothetical situations that I thought were interesting or entertaining.  I had many different fantasies.  Sometimes I would fantasize about becoming very muscular, sometimes about becoming very fat.  
These fantasies varied in degree of magnitude and the subject of the fantasy.  Sometimes I myself would change weight--I would become muscular or fat.  Other times, I would do something to make other people fat or musc…

Karing about others

Mostly because I have been thinking about her lately, I feel compelled to write about someone who was very dear to me.  Many people who have met me in the last several years may not be aware of the fact that I was married to a woman for 3 years. I understand there can be lots of confusion whenever I mention it, and misunderstandings or misconceptions might occur. So I would like to take this opportunity to discuss my feelings about her.

Shortly after I came out, I attended a party for ex-Mormon gay people. Many of them had been married (to someone of the opposite sex), as I had. Most of those marriages had ended in divorce. Sometimes the divorce was very ugly, other times it was rather pleasant and they remained friends throughout the process. I assume it is because of the ugly divorce scenarios that this statement was made to me. Upon revealing that I had previously been married to a woman and that the marriage had ended in her death, a man said to me that it was good that it had end…

The scientific method vs the religious method

I find it interesting when people cite the fact that science keeps changing as a reason to disbelieve it and to believe instead in the "eternal" doctrines taught by some church or other.  Let's examine why science keeps changing.  Here's the scientific method.

Develop a hypothesis (this means "have a belief").Design an experiment to test the hypothesis.Conduct the experiment.Determine whether the hypothesis is believable based on the results of the experiment. This is why science keeps changing--because people notice flaws in it and correct them.  People once thought the solar system was geocentric, but now know that it's heliocentric.  How did this happen?  By using the scientific method.  Scientists are willing to admit that they're wrong.  They're willing to give up a bad idea when they see evidence that it makes no sense.  Contrast this with the religious method (simplified version). Have a belief.Look for evidence to support that belief.Ignor…