Skip to main content

Don't teach my children

So, another one of the main arguments I've heard in opposition of gay marriage/homosexuality in general is "I don't want you to teach my children that that's ok." or something along those lines.  I've had many people in my own family express this sentiment to me, and others that have expressed it, but not to me personally.  I honestly have no problem complying with that request.  It is your responsibility to teach your own children.  But, that having been said, I have a request for you: please don't teach my children (or other people's children--especially children of gay couples) that homosexuality is wrong.

Is this an unfair request?  I ask no more of you than what you ask of me.  You don't want me to teach in your public schools that it's ok, so don't teach in my public schools that it's wrong.  Teach it in your church, that's a private organization and I don't need to send my children there.

I've had people tell me that it's inappropriate for me to teach that homosexuality is ok in public settings, such as here on my blog and on my Facebook account.  If you want to enforce that standard on me, then I see no unreasonableness in asking you to do the same with your views on homosexuality.  If you don't want me to put my views somewhere public, like my wall, where your children may have access to it, then don't teach your views--that homosexuality is immoral--on those same forums.  This, I do not believe is reasonable.  In public settings, all people should have a voice.  Everyone should be able to voice their own opinion.  If you want your children to know what yours is, and you're worried about what they may have found on the Internet or elsewhere, then you should talk to them personally about it and let them know how you feel.

What's the difference?  In the privacy of your own home, you are king and queen, you decide what you want to invite in and what is unacceptable.  Therefore, I feel no qualms in respecting your wishes by not indoctrinating your children in things contrary to what you yourself would teach them.  In the public sphere, I feel no qualms in speaking my mind and letting my opinion be available to all who wish to read it.  I do not believe I am being unreasonable in asking you to play by the same rules that you wish to impose on me.

At any rate, you can't possibly hope to control all of the things that people will ever say in public, so hoping that the world will only teach the things that you personally believe is a bit unrealistic.  If you want your children to believe something--eg, something you believe in strongly--then you should teach it to them.  They'll understand that other people have different views.  They'll figure out that not everyone agrees with you, so trying to shield them from every possible argument that is contrary to the ones you teach them is a rather unwieldy task.  Personally, I think one of the best things parents can do for their children is to teach them what they know/believe and then let the children learn for themselves by experiencing life, making their own choices, and feeling the consequences of those choices.  I have seen parents who tried to shelter their children with their over-protectiveness and it has rarely done good in the child's life.

The last point I want to make is that "I don't want my children learning that" is a very poor reason to outlaw something.  You may not want your children to get a tattoo, but that doesn't mean you have to put all tattoo artists out of business.  You may not want your children to wear short shorts or sleeveless tops, but that doesn't mean you have to put a national ban on such articles of clothing.  I don't want my children to grow up learning that discrimination is okay, but I'm not going to try to change the law to make it so you can't teach whatever you believe in your churches.

Popular posts from this blog

What's a gainer?

If you haven't already done so, I would suggest reading my previous post before reading this one.  It's sort of an introduction and gives the motivation.  Also, by way of disclosure, this post is not sexually explicit but it does touch on the topic of sexuality and how that relates to the subject at hand.

So, what is a gainer?  I'll relate, as best I can, the experiences I have gone through myself to help answer the question.  I remember when I was a young boy--perhaps around 6 or 7--I would have various fantasies.  Not sexual fantasies, just daydreaming about hypothetical situations that I thought were interesting or entertaining.  I had many different fantasies.  Sometimes I would fantasize about becoming very muscular, sometimes about becoming very fat.  
These fantasies varied in degree of magnitude and the subject of the fantasy.  Sometimes I myself would change weight--I would become muscular or fat.  Other times, I would do something to make other people fat or musc…

Karing about others

Mostly because I have been thinking about her lately, I feel compelled to write about someone who was very dear to me.  Many people who have met me in the last several years may not be aware of the fact that I was married to a woman for 3 years. I understand there can be lots of confusion whenever I mention it, and misunderstandings or misconceptions might occur. So I would like to take this opportunity to discuss my feelings about her.

Shortly after I came out, I attended a party for ex-Mormon gay people. Many of them had been married (to someone of the opposite sex), as I had. Most of those marriages had ended in divorce. Sometimes the divorce was very ugly, other times it was rather pleasant and they remained friends throughout the process. I assume it is because of the ugly divorce scenarios that this statement was made to me. Upon revealing that I had previously been married to a woman and that the marriage had ended in her death, a man said to me that it was good that it had end…

The scientific method vs the religious method

I find it interesting when people cite the fact that science keeps changing as a reason to disbelieve it and to believe instead in the "eternal" doctrines taught by some church or other.  Let's examine why science keeps changing.  Here's the scientific method.

Develop a hypothesis (this means "have a belief").Design an experiment to test the hypothesis.Conduct the experiment.Determine whether the hypothesis is believable based on the results of the experiment. This is why science keeps changing--because people notice flaws in it and correct them.  People once thought the solar system was geocentric, but now know that it's heliocentric.  How did this happen?  By using the scientific method.  Scientists are willing to admit that they're wrong.  They're willing to give up a bad idea when they see evidence that it makes no sense.  Contrast this with the religious method (simplified version). Have a belief.Look for evidence to support that belief.Ignor…